North America likely one of few locations on Earth where people are shamed for sharing housing among two or more generations.
I have encountered numerous situations here in Tampa Bay area where families will purchase two 'normal-sized houses backing up to one another and then build fencing to construct a virtual compound where five to six adult money-earners can pool their resources while also assuring that multiple school age children are provided for in above-average fashion.
No day care costs because the grandmothers and mothers pool their time to not only make money but also provide stable home environments. Surplus money is channeled into doubling house payments and feeding college education funds.
In all cases, these families are first or second generation immigrants. I have never seen it with families indigenous to the USA for 3+ generations
I have encountered numerous situations here in Tampa Bay area where families will purchase two 'normal-sized houses backing up to one another and then build fencing to construct a virtual compound where five to six adult money-earners can pool their resources while also assuring that multiple school age children are provided for in above-average fashion.
No day care costs because the grandmothers and mothers pool their time to not only make money but also provide stable home environments. Surplus money is channeled into doubling house payments and feeding college education funds.
In all cases, these families are first or second generation immigrants. I have never seen it with families indigenous to the USA for 3+ generations
I apologize if my post implied she was a failure for coming back home. Not intent . Rather, i feel the traditional dad expects the son to be more self -reliant than the daughter. In today's world is that fair ?
that $2500 rent was void of sex . The boy would have paid the same with similar salary
full disclosure - we have two boys , will never experience having a daughter .the sensation /feeling obligating to help more ? To be more protective ?
You Western European background ?
I apologize if my post implied she was a failure for coming back home. Not intent . Rather, i feel the traditional dad expects the son to be more self -reliant than the daughter. In today's world is that fair ?
that $2500 rent was void of sex . The boy would have paid the same with similar salary
full disclosure - we have two boys , will never experience having a daughter .the sensation /feeling obligating to help more ? To be more protective ?
You Western European background ?
Yes of course that's how I was raised. My Mom never worked a day in her life ( well of course at Home she did )
Sicily
Its only "loserville" if the kid is doing nothing with his/her life. If kid is living at home but is in school, working full time at low pay, getting their life back together, then there is nothing wrong with it.
If kid is living at home mooching, sleeping til 11, playing on the computer/video games all day, then its loserville
If kid is living at home mooching, sleeping til 11, playing on the computer/video games all day, then its loserville
When I was about 20 I moved out. I was working 2 jobs things were sure heck of a lot cheaper back then in 1986. I remember I had a little studio apartment. No view. Looking out the 1 window all I saw was bricks. I was all worn out working at Brown bear car wash and South County Journal. It was one of the biggest newspaper companies here at that time. Worked there until July 2007 everyone got laid off. They closed. So got a new job then at another newspaper place. Barely getting by today. My rent is $880 a month here in Auburn. In Seattle rent is thru the roof.
My brother is a prime example of what I would deem a failure in this thread. He went to college and got a good education. Moved out on his own in his 20s. Built himself up into a career, got married, bought a house, had a kid. Then things went south. His wife and him grew apart, he started to cheat on her, the affair blew up and he seemed to bounce from girl to girl trying to justify his existence. He battled depression and suicide, faked a major illness to garner sympathy. End up losing his marriage, short sold his house before it got foreclosed on. Had his car repossed, lost his job by just quit showing up, ignored their phone calls. Run ins with the law for outstanding tickets and unpaid taxes. Used my name at a traffic stop bc he thought he had warrants and got tickets in my name. Christmas time will mark 3 years with no job. A coworker and friend let him move in (he sells plasma to give him rent money), but they coworker has grown tired of his lazy act (doesn't help out around the house, welches off my parents, plays pokemon go and insults strangers on facebook posts for most of his time). Coworker gave him 60 days notice to move, so hes got about 45 days to find a place, which means moving back in with my parents and living off them, because he wont get his shit together and get a job. he turns 37 later this year.
My son was 22, 10 months out of college when he got a job in the city.
My daughter was 29, three years working full time after grad school when she bought her own home.
They both were welcome to stay longer, as long as they weren't lazy assholes doing nothing with their lives
My daughter was 29, three years working full time after grad school when she bought her own home.
They both were welcome to stay longer, as long as they weren't lazy assholes doing nothing with their lives
