Darryl, I watched a story about The Wiskey Robber of Budapest last night. Attila Ambrus the inept goalie turned bank robber.
Attila Ambrus, the Robin Hood of Eastern Europe. He's the onetime pelt smugger, goaltender (possibly the worst in the history of professional hockey), pen salesman, Zamboni driver, gravedigger, church painter, roulette addict, building superintendent, whiskey drinker, and native of Transylvania who's decided that the best thing to do with his time is to rob as many banks as possible.
His rival: Lajos Varjú, the Inspector Clouseau of the Iron Curtain, whose knowledge of police work comes from Hungarian-dubbed episodes of Colombo. His deputy is nicknamed "Mound of Asshead" because of his propensity for crashing police cars. His forensics expert, known as "Dance Instructor" for his lucrative side career teaching ballet, wears a top hat and tails on the job.
Welcome to Julian Rubinstein's uproariously funny and unforgettable account of crime in the heart of the new Europe. With a cast of backup characters that includes car wash owners, exotic dancers, drunk army generals, cocaine-snorting Hungarian rappers, the Johnnie Cochran of Budapest, and a hockey team that seems to spend as much time breaking the law as they do practicing, Ballad of the Whiskey Robber gives us the most charming outlaw-hero since the Sundance Kid - and the Sundance Kid didn't play hockey.
As the Eastern bloc slips off its communist skin and replaces it with leopard-skin hot pants, Ballad of the Whiskey Robber is here to screw in the pink lightbulbs. Part Unbearable Lightness of Being, part Pink Panther, and part Slap Shot, Julian Rubinstein's tale is a spectacular literary debut - and a story so outrageous that it could only be true.
THE GOOD BAD GUYS:
ATTILA AMBRUS, the Whiskey Robber: Professional hockey goalkeeper, Transylvanian, former gravedigger, church painter, pelt-smuggler, compulsive gambler, Johnnie Walker Red drinker, bank robber, prison escapee, Zamboni driver, folk hero.
Favorite food: Pig’s feet.
GABI ORBAN: Professional hockey player, coroner’s assistant, bumbling accomplice to previously mentioned bank robber.
KARCSI ANTAL: Professional hockey player, videotape salesman, used car dealer, toy store stock boy, former bank robbery assistant.
BUBU SALAMON: Professional hockey player, fellow Transylvanian, full-time goon.
THE BAD GOOD GUYS:
LAJOS VARJU: Robbery Chief Inspector. Twenty-nine years old and everything he knows about being a cop was learned from Hungarian dubbed episodes of Columbo and Miami Vice.
LAJOS SERES: Chief forensics investigator – also known as “Dance Instructor” because he was a dance instructor who came to work in top hat and tails to save himself the trouble of changing between his police work and lessons.
TIBOR VAGI: Deputy chief of the Budapest robbery department. So stupid he was known only by the Hungarian words that translated into “Mound of Ass-Head.”
THE GIRLFRIENDS:
SYLVIA: the first girlfriend and second woman Attila asked to marry – but the first he bought liposuction surgery for.
EVA FODOR: the second girlfriend, successful car wash owner and true love.
BETTY GERGELY: the third girlfriend, exotic dancer.
