***POWERBALL reaches Record 500+ MILLION!!- 1/2 a BILLION!!!! ***

[Willie99]

Here are just a few things that are more likely to happen to me than winning $500 million Wednesday night according to Money Mini Blog:

1. Killed by a vending machine (1 in 112 million): We have a vending machine here at work, but it's upstairs and I don't plan on going up there before I leave, so the only way I can see this happening is if someone wheels it over and somehow launches it on my head as I sit here and type thi.....AHHHHHHH! OUCH! Just kidding. That didn't really happen. And it probably won't.
2. Becoming an astronaut (1 in 12.1 million): But if you win the lottery, and don't mind going to Russia, you can pay to be an astronaut! Is that still a thing?
3. Getting attacked by a shark (1 in 11.5 million): I'm no Richard Dreyfus, but I'm pretty sure there aren't any sharks here in the Spokane area, so I feel like the odds of that happening are just about as likely as winning the lottery, but whatever you say random Google search.
4. Becoming President of the United States (1 in 10 million): Your odds significantly improve if your last name is Bush or Clinton. There hasn't been a President Howard yet (You were so close William Howard Taft!), but if you'd like to write me in, I promise to make America great aga...wait. Nevermind.
5. Dying from a bee, hornet or wasp sting (1 in 6.1 million): It's the middle of winter! How's this going to happen? Unless Nichole Mischke is keeping a hornet's nest in her desk next to mine and has been training them to specifically and systematically attack me at just the right moment. Otherwise, I'm probably safe. Though perhaps there is some sort of winter wasp I don't know about. If you are going to store hornets in a box, remember what Charlie from It's Always Sunny in Philadelphia says: Always pop an "H" on the box so people know it's full of hornets.
6. Becoming a movie star (1 in 1.5 million): These odds actually seem pretty good. I mean, if that guy from Twilight can do it, shouldn't we all be able to? Does anyone know an agent?
7. Being killed by flesh-eating bacteria (1 in 1 million): I can't imagine a situation where this happens. Though last night I did go to the gym and forgot to bring my shower flip flops. Had to go barefoot. Uh oh. Stay tuned.
8. Getting struck by lightning (1 in 1 million): I just spoke with Blake Jensen who assured me he didn't see any lightning in the forecast tonight. Blake has a pretty good track record. I think we're safe from this one.
9. Drowning (1 in 2 million): Not planning on hitting an lakes or rivers on the way home. But I think I'll stay out of the gym pool... just for tonight.
10. Drowning specifically in the bathtub (1 in 840,000): Those odds just significantly improved! Guess I'm not taking a bath tonight either.
11. Dying in an on-the-job accident (1 in 48,000): I'm sitting at a computer. What could go wrong? According to every Final Destination movie I've ever seen... a lot. And there's still that vending machine scenario from earlier. I'm going to type extra carefully now.
12. Becoming a pro athlete (1 in 22,000): This doesn't just mean football or baseball. If you get paid to play a sport, you're a pro athlete. Depending on your definition of a sport, I guess. It seems like with enough time and practice, we could all join the Profession Bowlers Association.
13. Being murdered ( 1 in 18,000): Though those odds aren't city-specific, the fact that I have a 1 in 18,000 chance of being murdered is quite disturbing. I defer to my bouncer idol Dalton from Roadhouse: "Be Nice." That will at least up my odds of not getting murdered.
14. Win an Oscar (1 in 11,500): Pretty good odds for you Leonardo DiCaprio! This is your year! I feel it! Just like I feel I'm going to win the Powerball tonight!

So that's pretty depressing that I have a better chance of all of those things happening to me than winning $500 million. However, as I said, I'm an optimist. At least when it comes to winning the lottery. So here are a few things that have worse odds than winning:

1. Getting a perfect NCAA bracket (1 in 9,223,372,036,854,775,808): But if someone is going to offer you a billion dollars for getting one, you should try, right? As Wesley Snipes always says (probably) "Go Zags!"
2. Shuffling a deck of cards into perfect, sequential order (1 in 10^68): This is so far fetched that we had to break out that little arrow to indicate an exponent!
3. Being hit by a meteor: (1 in 182,138,880,000,000): I found a meteor one time in Idaho. Pulled in around a little red wagon. Ate hamburgers and french fries off of it. It was my best friend. I later found out it was just a frozen chunk of poopy from an airplane emptying its toilet at 36,000 feet. OK, that was Joe Dirt, not me. I wonder what the odds of actually discovering one of those Boeing Bombs is?

just curious

how can drowning be 1 in 2,000,000 but drowning in a bathtub be 1 in 840,000

killed by a vending machine? they have a stat for that?

 

[festeringZit]

Next drawing tomorrow (Saturday), jackpot expected to be around 700 Million.

 

[Hamilbet]

Make that $800 Mil

[COLOR=rgba(255, 255, 255, 0.498039)]SAUL LOEB/AFP/GETTY IMAGES
[/COLOR]
Powerball: Next Drawing Estimated to Be Record $800 Million After No Winning Jackpot Tickets Sold
"This is more than 10 times what we see when the jackpot is at the lower levels," a Texas Lottery spokesperson said when the jackpot stood at $450 million. The next drawing is set for Saturday.

 

[C.P.]

800 mil
single winner gets

About $355 million after taxes (lump sum), budget accordingly​

 

[DNoonan]

I am in....buying the RX and banning about a third of you guys next week...haaaaaa

good luck all

 

[DNoonan]

I am in....buying the RX and banning about a third of you guys next week...haaaaaa

good luck all

for those of you I dont ban after I win and buy therx, I will be using 1M of my powerball winnings to throw a sick bash for offshore posters active as of today

i encourage all of you to make a similar pledge....pretty sure one of us will win it and it is probably our best chance of having another bash

 

[JOH]

Get your numbers in. Let's have some fun with this.. lol

http://www.therxforum.com/showthread.php?t=1042456&p=11425896&viewfull=1#post11425896

 

[Murphy8276]

800 mil
single winner gets

About $355 million after taxes (lump sum), budget accordingly​

lol budget accordingly


-murph

 

[JOH]

just went up to $900 M

 

[Greenbacks]

800 mil
single winner gets

About $355 million after taxes (lump sum), budget accordingly​

800 million will get you 496 million

 

[JOH]

just went up to $900 M

$558M Cash Value

 

[FearTheRaven]

At this amount, couldn't you buy every possibility and guarantee yourself a win?

i mean it'd probably cost around $400 mil

 

[Murphy8276]

At this amount, couldn't you buy every possibility and guarantee yourself a win?

i mean it'd probably cost around $400 mil

Yes of course, but you can't guarantee it wont be a split 27 different ways especially with this amount of entries..its bound to be a duplicate of other tickets odds wise.

-murph

 

[GoSooners]

 

[C.P.]

The Power Ball is now 900 mil...wtf

If no one wins tonight it moves to $1.3 billion for Wednesday's drawing...HOLY FVCK

 

[8ate]

I got 40 tickets; wtf; someone has to win..gl..Only will have 440 K for a bash though...gl

 

[Betallsports]

spent $60 this time around ... double up

 

[C.P.]

^^^ pretty funny me too ^^^...cheersgif

 

[tanner12oz]

Yes of course, but you can't guarantee it wont be a split 27 different ways especially with this amount of entries..its bound to be a duplicate of other tickets odds wise.

-murph

if i went to the local gas station and played every combo i would probably end up dying before having the cashier print all the tix

 

[ML Dog]

$558M Cash Value

Could probably live on $558,000,000...Mind Boggling that The Gov gets $342,000,000 though...

No Tax Shelter possibilities? No chance of "fudging" on this?

I'd imagine probably not....$342 Million to Big Brother.....right off the top.....mang...what if your desire was for as much of that $342 Million go to Charities of your choosing?

I mean......you HAVE $900 Million....absolute inescapable REALITY is one has no say whatsoever on $342 Million of that?

Its just GONE? And into the hands of The Government?

Period. End of Conversation?