Please help me find the world's lamest joke!!!

[JakeT.]

I love these things. Some of my favorites...

What do you call a sleeping cow?
A Bulldozer.

Two peanuts were walking down the street. One was assaulted.

knock knock
whos their
interrupting cow
interupting co-------
MOOOOOOOOOOOO

Whats cheese thats not yours?
NACHO CHEESE




You get the idea. Anyone got any really lame ones?

 

[JakeT.]

Oh, also...

There are two muffins in a oven. One says "hello" to the other, the other responds "HOLY SHIT A TALKING MUFFIN!"

 

[Dante]

how about

" there was this guy that could get any chick he wanted and he walked into a olive garden"


can not remember how it ends

 

[JakeT.]

how about

" there was this guy that could get any chick he wanted and he walked into a olive garden"


can not remember how it ends

Haha I'm not that good. You are not trying hard enough if you aren't getting turned down a lot. That's my saying.

 

[Maniac]

2 fish in a tank and one turns to the other and says:

"How the hell do you drive this thing"

 

[OnWisconsin]

what do you get when you cross a penis and a potato?

a dick-tater

 

[NES]

Why does a milking stool only have three legs? Cuz da cow has da udder.

 

[NES]

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Duane
Duane who?
Duane da bafftub Im dwownding

 

[NES]

What did the dog say when he sat on the sandpaper? Ruffffff

 

[NES]

Knock Knock
Who's there?
Boo
Boo who?
Dont cry its only a joke

 

[JakeT.]

Nice work so far fellas.

My current favorite suggestion:

Why does a milking stool only have three legs? Cuz da cow has da udder.

 

[NES]

I bet the waiting staff at the olive garden will get a real kick out of that one Jake, may help you get out of leaving a tip.

 

[JakeT.]

I bet the waiting staff at the olive garden will get a real kick out of that one Jake, may help you get out of leaving a tip.

Drunk chicks love stupid jokes man.

 

[barman]

An elephant is standing under a coconut tree when a spider monkey jumps down and starts fucking him in the ass.

The elephant doesn't notice because spider monkeys are pretty small.

A coconut falls and hits the elephant on the head and he says, "Ouch!"

The monkey smiles and says, "Yeah!!...Take it Bitch!"

 

[pumpuup]

Two blondes are lying on the beach, a piece of turd floats past and says
"girls, come on in, the waters great"

One blonde says to the other " Can you believe that shit"

 

[OnWisconsin]

2 flies're hanging out on top of a turd. one fly lifts its leg and farts.

the other fly says, "hey, watch it man, i'm tryin' to eat here."

 

[carlspackler]

Two elephants are in a tub taking a bath. One elephant turns to the other one and asks for the soap. The other elephant answers "No Soap, Radio"

 

[bearmz]

What time is it when when a clock strikes thirteen?
Time to get a new clock.

A termite walks into a bar and asks," Is the bartender here?"

A guy walks into a doctor's office with a carrot in his nose and stalk of celery in his ear. The doctor told him he wasn't eating right.

A man entered a pun contest. He sent in ten different puns hoping one would win. Unfortunately, no pun in ten did.

hno:
:toast:

 

[quantumleap]

Why did the elephant wear sunglasses?
So no one would recognize him.

How can you tell if an elephant has been in your refrigerator?
You can see his footprints in the butter.

A Guy goes into see a psychologist dressed in nothing but plastic clear wrap. The doctor tells him "Well I can clearly see your nuts!"

Roses are red,
Violets are blue,
Some poems rhyme
but this one doesn't.

 

[Brotherwo]

What's like having sex with an 80year old women?

Have you ever opened a grilled cheese sandwich?