It just felt weird.
I‘m in this football prediction contest called Knockout. I, along with 76 other guys, put $25 in a pot. All you have to do is pick the winner of any NFL game of your choice. If your team wins, you go on to the next week. If they lose, you’re eliminated. The last guy standing gets all the money. In this case: $1,925.
So it came time to pick the first game. The natural selection was obvious – Houston Texans at Miami Dolphins.
But...it just felt weird. That game looked strange somehow. I was having (insert dramatic music) – a hunch.
Yes, the Dolphins were heavily favored (14 points at game time which is a flat-out lock cinch in betting circles) and were at home on Opening Day in good weather. But my gut said watch out.
So I passed on the Texans-Dolphins clash and went with Kansas City who (thankfully) won easily. But 67 of my fellow Knockouters picked Miami.
Being highly concerned about the contest, I rushed home after church, turned the TV on, and immediately went to sleep. Waking up occasionally to turn over, I kept noticing that the Texans were staying in the game. Was I dreaming?
I woke up for good near the end of the game. Kris Brown – who quarterbacked those incredible Southlake Carroll teams that smoked everybody around here in the 90’s – kicked a field goal that gave the Texans a 21-20 victory.
Suddenly, I was in great shape in the Knockout game. My odds at winning $1,925 quickly went from 77-1 to 9-1. (Another guy picked Green Bay; they lost.)
Let me hasten to add that I don’t consider Knockout gambling. I don’t gamble much. I’ve been to Las Vegas just once and that was to play softball. I did lose $50 in slot machines. Then I went swimming.
Slots are luck, just as holding a winning Lotto Texas ticket is pure-dee luck.
(Apparently my college degree – eventually acquired after a mere 14 years of dedicated work – did not educate me enough to solve the mystery of lottery games. There are at least five of them where numbers can be picked: Lotto Texas, Pick 3 Day, Pick 3 Night, Cash Five, and Texas Two Step. It’s too confusing. So I just play Knockout.)
So, let’s say I win $1,925 thanks to my highly-educated football brain and hunch-filled/gassy stomach. There are three entities that must be taken care of immediately:
1. Taxes. I know people who won’t play the lottery because “of all those taxes you have to pay.” That’s true, but if you win, say $28 million, you still clear millions of dollars after taxes! Anyway, of my $1,925, I’d shear off 25 percent (that’s what the Texas Lottery withholds) for Uncle Sam – $481.25. So, I’m down to $1,443.75.
2. Church. I’ve often wondered: Would the church accept lottery winnings? What if someone won that $28 million and immediately gave their 10 percent tithe ($2.8 million) to their church? (Of course, the primary question here could be: Has a Christian ever won a lottery?)
Anyway, would churches consider the $2.8 million tainted cash? Or would they take that “devil’s money” and turn it into something good?
I certainly would give my fair share of Knockout money to my church, right off the original amount. In fact, I’d pass on well beyond 10 percent and give $300 – just in case the new money is evil. If it’s ill-gotten, at least I tithed big time on it. Maybe my heavenly mansion will be just slightly reduced...perhaps I’ll only lose a shutter or have a smaller entryway or something like that. That knocks me down to $1,143.75.
3. My wife. My wife hates gambling. So she’d certainly have to be pacified, probably in a sniveling Kobe Bryant kind of way. I’d have to buy her a $1,000 piece of jewelry. So, out of $1,925, I’d be left with $143.75. I have a hunch I’d blow that on CDs. Or Maalox.
http://www.azle-news.com/news/get-news.asp?id=2309&catid=2&cpg=get-news.asp
I‘m in this football prediction contest called Knockout. I, along with 76 other guys, put $25 in a pot. All you have to do is pick the winner of any NFL game of your choice. If your team wins, you go on to the next week. If they lose, you’re eliminated. The last guy standing gets all the money. In this case: $1,925.
So it came time to pick the first game. The natural selection was obvious – Houston Texans at Miami Dolphins.
But...it just felt weird. That game looked strange somehow. I was having (insert dramatic music) – a hunch.
Yes, the Dolphins were heavily favored (14 points at game time which is a flat-out lock cinch in betting circles) and were at home on Opening Day in good weather. But my gut said watch out.
So I passed on the Texans-Dolphins clash and went with Kansas City who (thankfully) won easily. But 67 of my fellow Knockouters picked Miami.
Being highly concerned about the contest, I rushed home after church, turned the TV on, and immediately went to sleep. Waking up occasionally to turn over, I kept noticing that the Texans were staying in the game. Was I dreaming?
I woke up for good near the end of the game. Kris Brown – who quarterbacked those incredible Southlake Carroll teams that smoked everybody around here in the 90’s – kicked a field goal that gave the Texans a 21-20 victory.
Suddenly, I was in great shape in the Knockout game. My odds at winning $1,925 quickly went from 77-1 to 9-1. (Another guy picked Green Bay; they lost.)
Let me hasten to add that I don’t consider Knockout gambling. I don’t gamble much. I’ve been to Las Vegas just once and that was to play softball. I did lose $50 in slot machines. Then I went swimming.
Slots are luck, just as holding a winning Lotto Texas ticket is pure-dee luck.
(Apparently my college degree – eventually acquired after a mere 14 years of dedicated work – did not educate me enough to solve the mystery of lottery games. There are at least five of them where numbers can be picked: Lotto Texas, Pick 3 Day, Pick 3 Night, Cash Five, and Texas Two Step. It’s too confusing. So I just play Knockout.)
So, let’s say I win $1,925 thanks to my highly-educated football brain and hunch-filled/gassy stomach. There are three entities that must be taken care of immediately:
1. Taxes. I know people who won’t play the lottery because “of all those taxes you have to pay.” That’s true, but if you win, say $28 million, you still clear millions of dollars after taxes! Anyway, of my $1,925, I’d shear off 25 percent (that’s what the Texas Lottery withholds) for Uncle Sam – $481.25. So, I’m down to $1,443.75.
2. Church. I’ve often wondered: Would the church accept lottery winnings? What if someone won that $28 million and immediately gave their 10 percent tithe ($2.8 million) to their church? (Of course, the primary question here could be: Has a Christian ever won a lottery?)
Anyway, would churches consider the $2.8 million tainted cash? Or would they take that “devil’s money” and turn it into something good?
I certainly would give my fair share of Knockout money to my church, right off the original amount. In fact, I’d pass on well beyond 10 percent and give $300 – just in case the new money is evil. If it’s ill-gotten, at least I tithed big time on it. Maybe my heavenly mansion will be just slightly reduced...perhaps I’ll only lose a shutter or have a smaller entryway or something like that. That knocks me down to $1,143.75.
3. My wife. My wife hates gambling. So she’d certainly have to be pacified, probably in a sniveling Kobe Bryant kind of way. I’d have to buy her a $1,000 piece of jewelry. So, out of $1,925, I’d be left with $143.75. I have a hunch I’d blow that on CDs. Or Maalox.
http://www.azle-news.com/news/get-news.asp?id=2309&catid=2&cpg=get-news.asp
