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Iran, France and Indonesia Promise Massive Aid in New Orleans Reconstruction
Kofi Annan's hastily called meeting of UN members has produced a unanimous decision to send massive aid to the United States for the reconstruction of New Orleans.
Iran jumped onboard very quickly.
Supreme leader of Iran, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, stated emphatically that, "the generosity of the Americans after our two recent earthquakes must be returned. We were only waiting for an American disaster anyway to return the money, and this is of the scale that we believe is just and right. America, through my good friend President Bush, sent us millions of American dollars after our earthquakes. Bam has already been rebuilt. Iran will rebuild New Orleans." Ayatollah Ali Khamenei then added "we will sell the Russian nuclear facility back to Russia and send 100% of the proceeds to the good people of New Orleans, on top of our already promised aid." Mr. Khamenei then help up a large "Golden Key to the Nation" and offered it to the IAEA, and said all facilities are open for inspection. Any weapon of mass destruction facility found by the IAEA will be sold for scrap and the proceeds sent to the New Orleans Reconstruction Fund of the World Bank (the World Bank has canceled pending loans to Yemen and Saudi Arabia and will instead send this money to the New Orleans Reconstruction Fund).
Kofi Annan was quick to cool the growing flames of passion in the swelling pledges earmarked for New Orleans (Germany has announced its first installment of USD 800 million, but noted that more installments will soon follow, similar to the continual relief supplies brought in during the Berlin Airlift by the American cargo planes). Mr. Annan reminded all members that 7% of their GDP must be given to the general fund and the UN will decide where this aid money will go.
However, Jacques Chirac stood up immediately and announced he would not follow Annan's orders. Mr. Chirac said that France will pledge $1 billion dollars and has ordered the French aircraft carrier "Charles de Gaulle" to the Gulf of Mexico to aid in relief efforts. Mr. Chirac pounded the table and denounced any implication by Annan that money should flow through to the UN first before being distributed to the Americans in need. Mr.Chirac said that "Americans spilled blood for France. I will be damned if there is one day delay in getting our $1 billion (USD equivalent) to America." Mr. Chirac also stated that "now may be as good time as any to apologize on behalf of France to the family of Ronald Reagan and the people of the United States for the unfortunate mistakes in the past related to Libya." Chriac has also mobilized troops, as part of his New Orleans aid package, to send to Iraq to join forces with the American and British troops to "fight terrorism wherever it may be."
China also announced that the hundreds of billions of dollars flowing into the China from American importers will have some portion earmarked for their "good friends in America who have shown such generosity over the years in past natural disasters." Ambassador Yang Jiechi announced an immediate halt to DF-31 ICBM production until "the final brick in the wall is put in place in the Reconstructed New Orleans."
The outpouring of sympathy, money and prayers, especially from the Muslims in the Arab world, has been unprecedented.
George Bush stated this shows that America's $ trillion dollars of foreign aid over the years has warmed the hearts of all the people of the world. We are one." Bush stated that with so much money pledged for New Orleans, it is possible now for him to increase the aid to Africa from $15 billion (USD) to 30 billion. "Whatever comes in must go out," Bush said.
Kofi Annan's hastily called meeting of UN members has produced a unanimous decision to send massive aid to the United States for the reconstruction of New Orleans.
Iran jumped onboard very quickly.
Supreme leader of Iran, Ayatollah Ali Khamenei, stated emphatically that, "the generosity of the Americans after our two recent earthquakes must be returned. We were only waiting for an American disaster anyway to return the money, and this is of the scale that we believe is just and right. America, through my good friend President Bush, sent us millions of American dollars after our earthquakes. Bam has already been rebuilt. Iran will rebuild New Orleans." Ayatollah Ali Khamenei then added "we will sell the Russian nuclear facility back to Russia and send 100% of the proceeds to the good people of New Orleans, on top of our already promised aid." Mr. Khamenei then help up a large "Golden Key to the Nation" and offered it to the IAEA, and said all facilities are open for inspection. Any weapon of mass destruction facility found by the IAEA will be sold for scrap and the proceeds sent to the New Orleans Reconstruction Fund of the World Bank (the World Bank has canceled pending loans to Yemen and Saudi Arabia and will instead send this money to the New Orleans Reconstruction Fund).
Kofi Annan was quick to cool the growing flames of passion in the swelling pledges earmarked for New Orleans (Germany has announced its first installment of USD 800 million, but noted that more installments will soon follow, similar to the continual relief supplies brought in during the Berlin Airlift by the American cargo planes). Mr. Annan reminded all members that 7% of their GDP must be given to the general fund and the UN will decide where this aid money will go.
However, Jacques Chirac stood up immediately and announced he would not follow Annan's orders. Mr. Chirac said that France will pledge $1 billion dollars and has ordered the French aircraft carrier "Charles de Gaulle" to the Gulf of Mexico to aid in relief efforts. Mr. Chirac pounded the table and denounced any implication by Annan that money should flow through to the UN first before being distributed to the Americans in need. Mr.Chirac said that "Americans spilled blood for France. I will be damned if there is one day delay in getting our $1 billion (USD equivalent) to America." Mr. Chirac also stated that "now may be as good time as any to apologize on behalf of France to the family of Ronald Reagan and the people of the United States for the unfortunate mistakes in the past related to Libya." Chriac has also mobilized troops, as part of his New Orleans aid package, to send to Iraq to join forces with the American and British troops to "fight terrorism wherever it may be."
China also announced that the hundreds of billions of dollars flowing into the China from American importers will have some portion earmarked for their "good friends in America who have shown such generosity over the years in past natural disasters." Ambassador Yang Jiechi announced an immediate halt to DF-31 ICBM production until "the final brick in the wall is put in place in the Reconstructed New Orleans."
The outpouring of sympathy, money and prayers, especially from the Muslims in the Arab world, has been unprecedented.
George Bush stated this shows that America's $ trillion dollars of foreign aid over the years has warmed the hearts of all the people of the world. We are one." Bush stated that with so much money pledged for New Orleans, it is possible now for him to increase the aid to Africa from $15 billion (USD) to 30 billion. "Whatever comes in must go out," Bush said.
